My co-workers and I are diverse but we work side by side as a team and “get er dun." Things can get personal when you are flying and going on work or err “vacation” together. I’ve noticed something since I expanded my horizons and now get to fly all over God’s creation and spend time working with all of God’s beautiful creations :) I’m not stereotyping or maybe I am…actually, I prefer to call it an “observation.” The gay people I work with and serve are so incredibly kind and loving. There's a depth there of having suffered. A compassion and a kindness that is so evident. In my year of flying, I've worked with one gay guy who was grouchy so I would call that a minority ;) I’ve "observed" a lot of the Christians I fly with seem very unhappy and persnickety. I truly don’t understand this difference other than a lot of us Christians can be judgey-butts and overly focused on others problems without admitting to any of our own:( Maybe we have the joy, joy, joy, joy down in our heart but it's so deep no one can detect it? I have flown with some Christians who are truly joyful and kind too but it’s a little like a chupacabra sighting ;)
When I first gave my heart to God over a decade ago, I didn’t have much diversity in my life. I worked in the financial "world" but my bottom was firmly planted in the bible belt. One day I had a meeting with a couple of realtors. They were partners in business and in life and they happened to be the same sex. On my way to meet them for lunch, I told God (not really expecting an answer) “God, Jennifer really likes both of these ladies but If YOU want me to tell them what they are doing is wrong (speaking of their same sex relationship) then I WILL!” See, there's no question in there... I apologize, it’s annoying when people talk about themselves in the third person…pretentious but it works here because I felt like Jennifer liked them but I wondered, did God? As if I was more loving and kind than the One who created them?!? #dumb
Please give me grace, I was a baby Christian. Speaking of grace, I have used a large supply of it in my life being divorced three times and having two abortions. One of those abortions was about a year before I was having this conversation with my two new realtor friends. I had my own similar experience like this when I was younger so was I really in a place to talk about wrong or right to anyone? Still I had been reading the bible and it seemed SO CLEAR to me at the time: wrong versus right. Being gay was not okay so I was formulating how I might bring the subject up in a sneaky way…. Maybe I could ask them if they went to church? I made sure to wear my cross necklace noticeably outside my shirt buttoned up to my chin ;) as I deftly outmaneuvered someone into a parking spot with my fish sticker (JK ;) but the whole time I was driving, I was plotting: “So how should this go down..." I was fairly surprised when God responded to me: “Jennifer, this is none of your business. I didn’t call you to judge. I called you to love. If you can’t love others then at least be kind.”
WHACK! A sweet but firm God adjustment in my thinking. God gets pissed when you talk about his kids and I felt that righteous anger in the force of his response. If I need to deal with my kiddos on something then that is a PRIVATE matter between ME and THEM. It would be like me spanking someone else’s child without authority and what exactly had then done to me?? He was saying, “Don’t you dare touch my daughters' hearts. You’ll have to get through me first.” I would be fighting against God if I proceeded in my plan.
The situation brought to mind the woman caught in the act of adultery (Jn.8) They wanted to stone her. Jesus said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” Everyone that came to throw rocks and judge the exposed and vulnerable woman exited stage left quickly like me when I'm trying to get to lunch before the church crowd ;) Dang, I dropped my rock against these women like a hot potato. Kicking it off to the side so Jesus wouldn't see it.
Jesus then said: “Woman, where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.” The ONLY reason Jesus had the authority to address her personal life and sin was because HE WAS WILLING TO DIE FOR HER. He stood between her and the rock throwers. He protected her. He covered her.
The view looks different when we see from His perspective: a place of loving protection than it does from anger and judgment, doesn't it?
The view looks different when we see from His perspective: a place of loving protection than it does from anger and judgment, doesn't it?
Was I willing to protect and cover these women like Jesus had the woman caught in adultery? A gunman walks in. Would I step in front of my new friends to take the bullet? The bible says there isn't a greater love than the one willing to lay down their life for a friend. Thankfully, Jesus is the perfect sacrifice and already died for them but regardless my love simply wasn't at that level.
So I guess I “kind of” loved them but not enough to leave my children without their mommy ;) and until we love someone with purity…enough to give our life for them as Jesus did then basically their personal stuff is NUNYA. I learned a big lesson that day. I am free. Free to love and free to mind my own beeswax.
So I guess I “kind of” loved them but not enough to leave my children without their mommy ;) and until we love someone with purity…enough to give our life for them as Jesus did then basically their personal stuff is NUNYA. I learned a big lesson that day. I am free. Free to love and free to mind my own beeswax.
Oh, sure, Christians don’t say, “ I condemn you because you are gay. You are unacceptable to me and my god that I don’t really have a relationship with.” We don’t say it but we think it and others feel it. They feel it in our haughty glances and superiority complexes. Our behavior is like the birds that poop on me every time I try to do patio seating under the tree at Joe T. Garcias. The cute little birdies look down from their pious perch and then fly away after they've dropped a poop bomb on my unsuspecting and unprotected head. I imagine that's how gay people feel after they've been "witnessed to." Even over the last year I’ve secretly judged in my mind waiting for opportunities to push my agenda instead of honoring, respecting, and serving. God is so good to speak to me in that moment WHEN I ASK when I build walls where no love flows. I ask God to help me only say what He says and do my best to treat all with His love.
A friend of mine (yes, she’s a Christian) is wholeheartedly in support of anyone who chooses an “alternative lifestyle.” She said, “It’s perfectly fine to be gay. As Christians we are called to unconditionally love others NO MATTER WHAT.” True but I felt God said, she has also made a judgment. I, personally, have found no need to make any judgment. I'm not in leadership or in authority over their lives. Jesus doesn’t CONDEMN but nor does He say everything we do is A-okay. Our choices are OURS. Our behavior is worked out in relationship with our Father if and when we choose to ask Him, He will lovingly correct our thinking but it's great because He gives us the power to change what needs to be changed.
Jesus gave us a new commandment and He said it was THE GREATEST COMMANDMENT: Jn. 13:34 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." Simple stuff. How effective is it to shame someone or use fear to get them to God? There is such a thing as being completely right but completely wrong when we think and say things without love in our heart. If my love is surface I will focus on the exterior behavior. If my love is deep then I will see into their heart and recognize their value and beauty. I don’t have the backing of God if I'm a rock thrower. He doesn't support my judgment or hatred. Unless someone gives me a voice in their life then I don't have one. God knocks on the door to their heart. He doesn't come in like a wrecking ball ;)
I believe in the foundation of God's word found in the bible. I asked God one day, why does your word say you detest things like homosexuality, adultery etc. Why are they abominations? His answer: These things eclipse my children's view of me. Like growing up with a big tree in front of your window and we can't see the Sun/Son. The tree becomes all we can see, it's our focus and identity instead of seeing Him, receiving His warmth. That's what He detests-being away from us.
Think of the most precious thing to you: maybe your child or a favorite animal that you love unconditionally. Now imagine that your beloved could never hear your voice, you could never hold and comfort them when they were afraid or lonely, that your child couldn't hear your voice or completely feel your love. It would rip my heart in two to be separated from my child. There are no lengths that I wouldn't go to have my child back with me. I would want to somehow get the message to them that I love them and it's all going to be okay... That is the great sin: to be separated from Him and the sin of not knowing and believing in His love. John 16:9 The world’s sin is that it refuses to believe in me
It truly breaks His heart to be apart from us but Christians aren't seeing through eyes of love and reconciling hurting ones with their Father. That to me is pretty disgusting.
So Is it okay to be gay?? Why don't you start a dialogue with God and ask His heart on the matter. Don't believe what I say, believe that He can and will speak to you through the Holy Spirit. If someone asks me that question today, I would hold their hand and pray with them for them to feel the love of their Heavenly Father. I would ask for God to show who He is, how He feels, for them to have open ears when He speaks to them and I honestly don’t know what He will say to them directly. It's none of my business. I trust that it will not harm them and only prosper them.
This is where I'm at on it today and I've asked the Holy Spirit to correct me if needed. For those of you that think you know all the answers, are you humble enough to ask God His heart behind His words and truth? Are you brave enough to ask Him to only allow you to say what the Father is saying and do what the Father is doing?
For those of you who want to know the Father's heart towards you, will you pray with me?
Thank you merciful faithful high priest Jesus who intercedes and prays for us constantly, will you bring us back to our Father. Let us feel His loving embrace. See His beautiful face. Feel and know that we are beautifully and wonderfully made. Open our eyes to your amazing love and Your Truth. I'm waiting on You and You alone to show me the way.
